On the odd parts of my day, I’d be wondering what she would be doing right about now. And that is when I look at my clock to count the time zone difference. Most of the time, it would be at 3 p.m. or 8 p.m. her time. And each of those time when I ponder about her, the same question would pop up in my head “is she thinking of me too?”. And on each and every time I would lie and convince myself.. ‘of course she is” or “it doesn’t really matter”. And to be honest, some of the days it is super great that I could even get butterflies in my stomach. Crazy isn’t it? Just thinking about a girl that I don’t even know if she likes me could give me butterflies. But that is only “some” of the time. Other times.. I would feel like a sad sappy little amoeba and thinking hard how stupid I am and how much she don’t really like me. Back then I used to give her a morning text all day every day, but then I stopped. Why? Because that “some” days were over. And I ran out of indirectly subtle synonyms of “I love you”‘s to send to her.
Let’s just say, of the daily text sent her, I roughly get an average of 3 replies every week. The only conclusion that I can come up with at that time would be that I was a nuisance to her. I know that ain’t true but maybe I’m a nuisance in the sense that after I send a text, then she would unwillingly think about me at least half of that morning. Maybe during that short brief I made her breakfast stale or made her late to get ready or... I don’t know... Something!?
After stopping sending her morning texts, I was okay. I think at one point I even stopped thinking about her for almost half of the day. I thought, maybe it is time that I get over this one and move on to my next hopeless romantic. That is, after friend-zoning someone. Haha. And as expected, I screwed that one up. Personally I don’t know who to blame. Nowadays I need to express how much in love I am with her before I can actually sleep. Well, not exactly ‘love’ her. Most of the time would be how much I miss her. Crap isn’t it? Just when I thought I could get over her.
In the end I’m just another cliché movie episode. I am that guy back home that waits for that sweet girl who is now in a relationship with some handsome kind tall Caucasian guy in some foreign country.
Perhaps, I am just what her brain needs, not what her heart wants.Dear Bloggie,
How've you been? heh..
change? yeah I've changed. So, now I'm already doing my internships at some place.
I just hate it.
In case I haven't introduce to you yet...
HERE COMES A NEW CHALLENGER!
this contender is a crazy one.
For starters, she made me wait for well.. you've read the above.
:)
that is all for now.
au revoir,
xoxo,
oh, i still love you so.
From peaches, now there is cotton candy.
Sweet.
